Wedding Bells

It's the time of year again. June is right around the corner and wedding bells are starting to sing. Which means the holy sacrament of matrimony is on our minds. 

As a Catholic, I was raised with the understanding that marriage is more than just a legal transaction that a pastor presides over. We were also raised understanding that marriage was more than the person that you call your husband in front of God. Marriage was taught as synonymous with the word vocation.

Wedding Vocation Bells

Each person has a vocation, a literal calling, from God. Each person is likely to experience different vocations throughout their lifetime, from single to married, from the priesthood to religious life. And we each have to open our hearts to God and God's Words to find our vocations throughout our life. It isn't a one-time process. Discernment is constant and active; seeking what the Lord needs to tell you about where you are to go and how you are to better serve God.

My discernment and eventually calling to married life was not centered around one person or thing, it wasn't about waiting around for Mr. Right. Similarly, a seminarian's discernment is not the lack of Miss Right. Our vocation is the best path for us, and is not about what others will do for us but about what we will do for others.

Sitting through weddings this summer, I want to encourage you to pray for your vocation and the vocations of those around you. Sure, it's easy for me to say, as the soon-to-be married woman, but my discernment is not over. The vocation of marriage is not complete when Josh and I exchange vows and rings, we will need all the prayers we can get!

Tota tua.

It'll All Come Together

My spring break started and ended with weddings. My mom and sisters hosted a bridal shower for me last Saturday and yesterday, the wedding season officially began with my friend, Cearrah's wedding.
I never thought the day would come when I felt more organized than Cearrah. I definitely never thought the day would come where I was the one helping Cearrah. Our friendship was built on Cearrah's caring for me during a rough patch my freshman year of college. Since then, we have been equals in our love of Harry Potter and books in general, with a friendship deeply rooted in fandoms, faith, and family.

Cearrah's wedding was firstly, and most importantly, a celebration of her and Tyler's vows and promises of forever. We celebrated their union. But it was not the most organized, nitpicked wedding I have ever been a part of. It was actually very scattered. And all Cearrah could say reassuringly was, "it will all come together".

"Do you have a plan for the tables?" her mom would ask. "No, but it'll come together once we're there." she would respond with an easy smile. "What about centerpieces? Do you have any particular ideas?" I ask, holding teapots and tulips in both hands. "Whatever you want to do, it'll come together." But right at one o'clock, as we settled in our seats so that Cearrah could walk to the front of the room, it had all come together. The cake and cupcakes looked great, the board games made great "centerpieces", and the guests were raving about the decorations. Because it had all come together.

I keep hearing how stressful weddings are. How busy that day is. How little time you actually get with the groom. I hear advice about delegating, about telling people exactly what I want. I spent five days of my spring break working my way through a lengthy list of wedding to-do's. I snapped at my fiance, who was just trying to help, and ranted to my maid of honor about how all I had wanted was a hot dog buffet line when we first got started. Saturday and Sunday with Cearrah really put me in my place. It'll all come together. It doesn't have to be perfect, because when it's all said and done, I get to say "I do" to Josh. Whether I have cloth or plastic tablecloths, at the end of the day, I'll be married to my best friend. Maybe I'm "more organized" than Cearrah, but she's doing it right, she's letting it come together and not stressing out about the details.

To all my brides out there, it'll all come together. We don't need to pull our hair out, we don't need to get upset. Do what you need to do to feel good about it, but don't lose sleep over the things you can't control. Order extra tablecloths if that makes you feel better. Make your centerpieces in advance. But remember, it'll all come together.

Tota tua.