Weddings Poppin' Up

Chelsea and I at her bachelorette
party this summer 

This Saturday, one of my best friends from high school, Chelsea,  is getting married to her camp crush and high school sweetheart after dating for over eight years. On Friday, a college friend, Tisha, whose wedding I really wish I could make it to, is getting married after lengthy engagement. So it is no wonder I've been thinking about my own wedding and marriage coming up in May.

I've had comments on both sides of the spectrum about my engagement, and I'm sure both of friends have as well. Everything from, "that's so exciting!" to "you're too young..." to "Why?".

Darn right it's exciting! I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with my best friend.

Too young? I mean, compared to what? a 15 year-old child bride in India? a 35+ divorcee? I think that's my decision, not yours.

Why? This one is my favorite. Why? Because Josh is awesome, that's why. And because we are awesome together, in a Cyclops and Jean Grey, kickin' butt and takin' names kind of way.

But marriage is something that you shouldn't take lightly. I love seeing posts about married life, and how wonderful and exciting and hard it can be. I think our society has polarized marriage to some degree. It's either this perfect relationship that lasts forever or it is a disaster in the making, and from what I understand about marriage, it is neither.

What I know about marriage (as an outsider getting ready for it):

• Marriage is not an answer to problems, if anything it will magnify what you were already struggling with as a couple 
• Marriage requires work, you can't just expect it to float along the river on its own 
• Carrying that metaphor further, it is not a 50/50 split, sometimes you are going to have to paddle harder than your partner and vice versa
• Marriage is about family and being willing to raise one
• Marriage can be a lot of fun 
• You get to live with your best friend
• Marriage requires a third party - God 

So let's review, marriage is not easy but it is worth the work. Marriage is what you make it, and marriage requires God, which means prayer! You need to pray to God with your spouse and for your spouse, but marriage is not just a legal contract between two parties, it is an agreement to help bring your partner closer to God, and how can you do that without water in your well? You have to keep praying to be able to even provide for your spouse. 

I remember when Chelsea and Matt started dating, and I remember watching them grow up. But as college rolled around, obviously I stopped seeing Chelsea as much. We were reunited at camp two years ago for some really in-depth friendship time, something we had not had in a while, and I was blown away by how at peace she was. Chels was never the frazzled sort, but this Chelsea had grown up and changed a lot, and I think a part of this was because of the church she and Matt and started to attend together. Not the church necessarily, or the pastor, but the community and sharing it with her then boyfriend. 

Now, I'm no marriage expert, but I think there is something to be said about the couple that prays together.

Tota Tua, 

LeAnn