Still Blogging

Almost a year ago, I decided I was done with this whole blogging thing. Someone had commented and tore apart what I had written, something that I had really believed in. I was mad and done. And (obviously) I got over it because there's more to life than how people respond to what you believe in. There's more to life than what social media has to say about you. And there's more to life than what those around you think of you. At some point, you have to decide who and what truly matters.

And what matters to me is that I love my family. I am beyond amazed by the love and marriage I have just entered. And God, who gave me all of this, matters. Matters more than the perception of my peers, more than the perception of my friends. My life, my family, my marriage, none of it would be possible without God. Which is why Timothy's letter rings so true to me today.

Remind people of these things
and charge them before God to stop disputing about words.
This serves no useful purpose since it harms those who listen.
Be eager to present yourself as acceptable to God,
a workman who causes no disgrace,
imparting the word of truth without deviation. (2 TM 2: 8-15)

I'm not perfect. My words are not perfect and that's not what matters. What matters is when we present ourselves before our God, we have no shame, no disgrace. We imparted the Words of Truth to the best of our ability, and did our best to share the Love we have for our God without any deviation. And that's what matters. That we did our best to share what we truly believe, irregardless of how others react. And as Timothy reminds us earlier in his letter, we were not made to be timid.

Tota tua.

Dear Camp Volunteer

Dear Camp Volunteer,

You recently sent your application in, and you're eagerly anticipating the your placement letters that will come out in early May. Never mind that this is over a month away, you're probably already checking your mailboxes with enthusiasm. Thank you so much for your eagerness and joy to volunteer at a summer camp. You are going to be such a fantastic addition to the teams that the director is slowly piecing together right about now. She may even be taking a break to write you this letter. I am so overwhelmed and humbled by how far our camp has come in the last two years, and I just wanted to take a moment and tell you all thank you.

1.) Thank you for volunteering eagerly. I, rather snottily, asked for you turn in applications on time this year, making it very clear I was not going to tolerate tardiness and you rose above and beyond. Whether it was because you were just excited to apply or because you truly listen to me, I am thankful that you did this, making my job a little bit easier.

2.) Thank you for being open to change. Not a week goes by that I don't have some kind of idea to mix things up. You've learned that I fear stagnation, and that I love to mix things up, and you've been open to everything I have tossed in your courts. Not only that, but you have been open with me about how feel about these things. Thank you! I listen to your opinions and truly take them into account each time I consider making some kind of large change. None of these would be successful without your genuine enthusiasm to try these ideas out.

3.) Thank you for your joy! Your applications seem to drip with the joy and excitement for the upcoming summer. Playful notes, sincere offers to do whatever is needed, and dreams about where you may be placed make reading them that much more fun. What could be a tedious office job is no more, because of how happily you filled out those applications. You make me excited to work with you this summer-your camp spirit is infectious.

4.) Thank you for your honesty. You tell me what you really think about the jobs being offered to you. It's okay that you don't want to work kitchen staff again! You did it last year, and we were thankful for you hard work, and besides that, I want you in a job you will love. Thank you for telling me that you cannot work two sessions or that last year was your last. I wish you all the best, and we will keep you in our prayers for years to come.

5.) Thank you for your faith, the faith that you are ready to share with campers this summer. Thank you for being willing to put yourselves out there and discuss the beauty of your faith, your personal relationship with God, and your own unique of getting to know God, the Son, and the Spirit, so that your campers can follow in your faith-on-fire footsteps.

6.) Thank you for trusting me with your most precious place, your home-away-from-home, and your safe place. The place where you can be beautifully and uniquely yourselves. The place where you are unafraid to feel all of the feels, participate in all of the things, and share yourselves with each other and me. Thank you for trusting me, despite my lack of constant warmth, my sarcasm, and the fact that sometimes I scare you.

7.) Thank you for all you give me. I would not be who I am, what I am today if was not for all you have taught me in the last two years as director, and the years before that as a fellow volunteer. You make me feel so brave and strong, so empowered, and so capable. Your faith in me helps me to do what I could never do. You truly bring out the best in me.

I hope you're getting excited for the summer, and I promise, those letters will come sooner than you think.

Tota tua.

Thrive not Survive

The Lord is my Shepherd, there is nothing I shall want PS 23:1-3A

I think oftentimes, when we hear that infamous Psalm, the thought is that because we have God, we should not want for anything. We should be well-fed and well-rested, we should not be afraid or anxious. Only good stuff will happen to us, because God is our Shepherd. All because we believe in God.That doesn't sound quite right to me; this idea that because we believe, we are never going to want.

That passive attitude that by believing, things are all going to be okay is a dangerous one. To have the faith of a child, to have the ability to truly rely on the Lord is an important one, but God is not there to do everything for us. We are called to work and to persevere with God beside us every day. In Paul's letter to the Philippians, we are reminded that we can do all. But there is more context to that quote than just the thirteenth line.

 Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.  Nevertheless, you have done well to share with me in my affliction. Philippians 4:11-14

What is being taught is a further, deeper understanding of the Lord's providence. There is more to it than just being provided for, but the reality is we can survive it all through God, the good or the bad. We may want all kinds of things, we may desire the world, but with God walking beside us through that dark valley, we can do more than survive it, we can thrive in it.

We have greater goals than not wanting for anything. There is more to achieve, more to want than just not being in humble circumstances. Abundance or suffering does not matter, as long as you trust in the Lord to help you survive whatever is in front of you.

Ringin' in 2016

(Written while sitting in the back row of my parents' diesel Exursion, en route to St. Louis for my aunt's NYE wedding festivities)

A new year offers people an opportunity for a fresh slate. Something about the number changing indicates a chance for newness, a new change, a fix for the new year. This year's resolution trend seems to be choosing a word for their new year. I've seen trust, hope, adventure, love, and faith so far scattered across my various social medias, and I smile at it, at the optimism for this new year, and the opportunities it brings.

In less than 6 months, I will be married, with a new last name and a permanent roommate, and I couldn't be more excited. 2016 holds so much for me, but I am thankful for 2015's opportunities as well. We warned the first week of classes that law school would be transformative, and I can feel it. Between living alone for the first time, and undertaking a major educational mountain of sorts. 

So, I suppose my "word" for the upcoming year would be change. All the changes in the last year will culminate with this next year of major life changes; ones that I can hardly wait for.

Ring in your new year safely, and with enthusiasm friends. Tackle your new year head on and try to accomplish a thing or two. Read a new book, learn a new skill, take a plunge of sorts.

Tota tua,

LeAnn

.