We are Seen

As I update my resume after one semester of law school, I pause and debate what should or should not be added. I did pass all of my classes, and although I am not a Dean's List student (3.0 or higher), I did not do poorly. But my past academic experiences weigh on me, saying that this GPA is no good, and that I should have worked harder, should have done better. The overall resume looks sparse, I have little legal experience; I keep reminding myself that I am only a 1L and this is normal, but again, it weighs on me. I feel like I've let myself, and more importantly, God down by not taking more initiative to gain experience and earn better grades.

But this morning I was reminded that God does not see us through human eyes.

And I was reminded that God really does not give a damn about resume or my cover letter. If I have been called to serve God and God's children through this, and if I put my trust in god, it will happen. That's not to say that I won't have to work, because I will, but God's got my back so to speak, and God is not judging me for such trivial human things. That ultimate goal, that truly big picture, is that whatever we do, we shall serve the Lord.

So stop berating yourself because your grades aren't quite what you wanted, your worth is not based on your As.
Stop kicking yourself because you didn't get the internship you wanted, keep trying, you'll eventually end up where you belong because tenacity truly pays off.
Don't become angry because the first job you apply for doesn't hire you, keep looking.

Ultimately, remember that your worth and value is not determined by how humanity perceives you, but how you make yourself available to God, the Son, and the Spirit. With that being said, as social creatures we crave human approval, we crave success, and we desire to be valued. And you can do all of those things, but along the way, do not forget that God is with you, loves you, and will continue to love you in a way no human can.

Tota tua,

LeAnn

Surviving Law School 101

I talked to my mom yesterday and she informed that family members have been asking about me...
Wondering if I am surviving law school, the "big city", and if law school is hard. So, I thought I would answer a few of those questions and put my grandma's mind at ease.

Am I surviving law school? 

Why, yes, I am. Don't get me wrong, there are moments where I'm scratching my head and am confused or frustrated by what is being taught but I am surviving. I've made a friend or two (or three), I have a pretty consistent schedule, and I'm not pulling my hair out with frustration.

Am I surviving the "big city"?

Yes. The only thing that really frustrates me is the traffic. "But wait!" scream the native KC-ers, "The traffic is not that bad!" Maybe not for you, but to me this is crazy. Word to the wise, if you are from a smaller town, like Monett, traffic is going to frustrate you. That it takes 10+ minutes to drive two and half miles is infuriating. The fact that grocery stores are NO WHERE near me is also frustrating, but hey, next time I'm looking for rentals, I'll remember to look for nearby grocery stores...

Is law school hard?

In the words of a dear friend of mine, is the Pope Catholic? Yes. Law school is hard. Reading 50 pages for one class is hard. Applying rules to convoluted fact patterns can be hard. But man, it is so worth it. If you do the reading, if you take clear notes, if you put forth the necessary effort, law school is not unbearably hard.

We were warned throughout orientation that law school, especially our first year, is a "transformative period in our lives". Yeah, okay, whatever...

No, really, it is. I think the biggest change I have seen so far is patience. I'm stuck in traffic, I'm anxious about getting to school, and as the weeks have gone by, I've learned to relax, I will get there eventually. There's no need to get upset. Maybe it is because we are moving slowly through material, maybe it's just the move to a new place, but I am definitely changing. I mean, for goodness sake, I bought Brussels sprouts at the farmer's market this weekend- I am on the cusp of adulthood.

With that being said, pray for the Pope on his tour through the United States this week, pray for me that I keep "surviving" law school.

Tota tua,

LeAnn