Whatever is...

With the church camp season almost upon us, lists are floating all over my small apartment. Lists of things to pack, purchase, leave behind, goals, and whatever else I can think of in preparation. There is so much that doesn't belong at camp, so what I allow myself to bring can be tricky. Not just longer shorts and extra deodorant, but there are spiritual things that have to come along to.

What am I bringing to camp this year? My prayer journal, my Bible, my Rosary. But more importantly, I am bring my favorite verse to meditate on as the weeks go by. My focus over the next fives will be a verse from Philippians that caught my attention at the end of the camp season last summer. I've carried it quietly in my head ever since then, but I have yet to truly put it into practice.

Last year's camp season was not an easy one. There were physical challenges (tornado, flood, heat, etc.) but there were more difficult emotional challenges. There was a grudge or two, some loneliness, and a fixation on the negative rather than the positives of camp.

Which is where Philippians 4:8 comes in. The goal over the next five weeks is to focus on the good, but more than just the good. The true, the noble, right, pure, lovely... You get the picture. I want to see those things. The excellent, praise-worthy pieces of camp and I want to keep them close as the weeks go by.

But more than that, I want this attitude to extend beyond camp. Somewhere along the way, camp became a sort of spiritual restart button for me. It's that time of year where I really check in and try to understand where I am at in my faith and how I can do better.


Tota tua.

The Paper Posts

A traditional gift celebrating a fiftieth wedding anniversary is gold, which is why a fiftieth is a called a golden year or golden anniversary. Similarly, the first year of marriage's gift is paper, thus "The Paper Posts" will be very marriage (and God) focused over the next year! 

When I'm feeling frustrated with a particular part of my life that I can't control, such as rental-house-hunting, for example, I like to rearrange my furniture. To date, I have rearranged the bedroom six times since moving into the apartment last August. I haven't messed with the living area though, until last night. Heedless of how Josh may feel about it, I practically turned the apartment on its head and then let him just come home to it. He wasn't a fan.

But instead of nay-saying or asking it to be put back, we worked together to come up with a layout we both liked. And I know that Josh would have probably preferred the apartment the way it was, but he understood that I needed this relatively small change in scenery. Throughout all of it, he was actively asking my opinion on the recliner or the desk, making sure that we achieved everything I had set out to do. That was more touching to me than anything else.

He could have been angry with me for rearranging without his permission. I could have taken it personally that he didn't like what I had spent an hour and half arranging carefully. Jesus reminds us in today's Gospel that whoever is angry with his brother will be liable for judgment.(MT 5:20-26). That we have to make the effort to reconcile with those around us before trying to make peace with God. There are times for righteous anger, but furniture is not one of them. It isn't something that belongs between spouses or between children and their God. As a married couple, a literal reflection of God's love, I feel this overwhelming need to make our fights count. To choose them carefully, with intent, so that the disagreement will better us as a couple, rather than cause us to lash out and stay angry, separating both of us from God.

Tota tua.

"1L of a Year," as They Say

In case anyone was curious, not only did I plan a pretty fantastic wedding, but I have officially passed my first year of law school. And man, was it quite the ride. They warned us at the beginning of the year that law school can be transformative, that we would change as the year progressed. 

I have slept, drank, and cried more in the last year than all four years in my undergraduate. I have also developed deeper friendships with the friends I arrived with and learned to make true friends in a competitive environment, something I could not have done a few years ago. I have learned how to think harder and study longer, how to sit still for hours upon hours. And through it all, I have been incredibly thankful for the uphill battle this has been. 

I think the most important thing I have learned in the last year though, is how to laugh at myself. Almost four weeks ago, sitting around a small fire, surround close friends and distance acquaintances, I laughed at myself for a simple, funny mistake about a person's name. And in the midst of my laughter, I marveled at the person I have become. That night, I made new friends, I played yard games and lost miserably without blinking an eye. I mentioned law school rarely, not flaunting my lucky position. 

Law school has humbled me. No longer am I a straight "A" student nor do I feel like the one of the smartest in the room, but this year gave me a better understanding of myself in time for my marriage. I'm more likely to ask for help when I need it and rejoice in the success of others as well as my own. My relationships, my work, my knowledge has grown thanks to the work I put into it, alongside those who loved and supported me along the way. 

Tota tua. 

Still Blogging

Almost a year ago, I decided I was done with this whole blogging thing. Someone had commented and tore apart what I had written, something that I had really believed in. I was mad and done. And (obviously) I got over it because there's more to life than how people respond to what you believe in. There's more to life than what social media has to say about you. And there's more to life than what those around you think of you. At some point, you have to decide who and what truly matters.

And what matters to me is that I love my family. I am beyond amazed by the love and marriage I have just entered. And God, who gave me all of this, matters. Matters more than the perception of my peers, more than the perception of my friends. My life, my family, my marriage, none of it would be possible without God. Which is why Timothy's letter rings so true to me today.

Remind people of these things
and charge them before God to stop disputing about words.
This serves no useful purpose since it harms those who listen.
Be eager to present yourself as acceptable to God,
a workman who causes no disgrace,
imparting the word of truth without deviation. (2 TM 2: 8-15)

I'm not perfect. My words are not perfect and that's not what matters. What matters is when we present ourselves before our God, we have no shame, no disgrace. We imparted the Words of Truth to the best of our ability, and did our best to share the Love we have for our God without any deviation. And that's what matters. That we did our best to share what we truly believe, irregardless of how others react. And as Timothy reminds us earlier in his letter, we were not made to be timid.

Tota tua.

Our Wedding Day

We've now been married all of two days. And right now, curled in our honeymoon suite, I am overwhelmed by the love and support we have been shown. I keep crying over the simplest things. Which is so unlike me; as my friends put it, "I've never seen you cry!" On Saturday night, I thought it was because I was tired. Yesterday. I thought it was because I was still overwhelmed. But today, I realized that it's because I am just that perfectly, incandescently happy.

I'm sure we will be sharing stories about our wedding for months to come, but my favorite will be about my in-laws. Only one thing went wrong on Saturday, our hotel realized they were double-booked and couldn't accommodate us while we were at the reception. I shrugged it off, we would find a place to sleep for the night. I wasn't worried and I had no reason to be. My sister-in-law, brother-in-law, and his fiancé were on it, with a little help from my dad, we had a room within the hour. 

I was raised in an amazing, giving family. A family that I know is a rarity, not everyone has aunts and uncles who attend middle school basketball games for you or brings your flowers at grade school dance recitals. But somehow, God gave me another family that is equally incredible and that dropped everything so that Josh and I had a beautiful place to spend our mini-honeymoon at. 

I didn't particularly want to change my name. I like the name and I love being a Verhoff. But as the engagement led into our wedding, and as the wedding led into the reception, I felt more at peace with the name change. I couldn't be happier to be a Wood and belong to such wonderful families. As Megan put it, "I fell asleep covered in glitter and beer," (we had a great reception), "and woke up with a wonderful sister-in-law." And so did I. Two actually. And two amazing brothers, and parents who will always be there for my husband and I. 

Tota tua. 

LeAnn Wood (!!) 

Wedding Bells

It's the time of year again. June is right around the corner and wedding bells are starting to sing. Which means the holy sacrament of matrimony is on our minds. 

As a Catholic, I was raised with the understanding that marriage is more than just a legal transaction that a pastor presides over. We were also raised understanding that marriage was more than the person that you call your husband in front of God. Marriage was taught as synonymous with the word vocation.

Wedding Vocation Bells

Each person has a vocation, a literal calling, from God. Each person is likely to experience different vocations throughout their lifetime, from single to married, from the priesthood to religious life. And we each have to open our hearts to God and God's Words to find our vocations throughout our life. It isn't a one-time process. Discernment is constant and active; seeking what the Lord needs to tell you about where you are to go and how you are to better serve God.

My discernment and eventually calling to married life was not centered around one person or thing, it wasn't about waiting around for Mr. Right. Similarly, a seminarian's discernment is not the lack of Miss Right. Our vocation is the best path for us, and is not about what others will do for us but about what we will do for others.

Sitting through weddings this summer, I want to encourage you to pray for your vocation and the vocations of those around you. Sure, it's easy for me to say, as the soon-to-be married woman, but my discernment is not over. The vocation of marriage is not complete when Josh and I exchange vows and rings, we will need all the prayers we can get!

Tota tua.

Saturday Special: Camp Graduates

To all of my staffers who graduated high school this May,

I am so excited for you and so proud. You have graduated high school! And with that comes a time that is unlike any other, where for the first time you will soon not have to answer to the adults in your life in the same way you did, where large decisions will fall to you, and you alone, and learning curve is much steeper than you realize. Best of luck graduates, you'll do great.

I do have some advice for you though, about this last summer home before you move. Whether moving across country, state, or staying at home, this summer is a special one. Remember that.

1. A Summer of Adventures
Go have fun this summer, take a trip you've always wanted to take, spend time with friends that you will be separating from come August. This is just the beginning of being able to do things like this, so start small while you're still at home and can have help from parents if you need it.

2. Speaking of Mom and Dad...
Don't alienate them. This is one of my biggest regrets from my late teens. Instead of celebrating adulthood alongside my parents, I pushed them aside. Instead of saying thank you for all they had done, I acted as if I had done it all my own. They will continue to do so much for you as college begins and pushing them aside does no one any good. You will need them when you get into your first accident or have to drop your first class. Just knowing your parents will catch when you will inevitably fall makes all the change ahead seem less scary.

3. Work Hard
The value of the dollar is going to start to mean more to you as you begin to finance more and more of your own life. Boring, I know, but true. Budget, work hard, save up. Take all the handouts you can from family members and send thank you cards. College can be a bit expensive, and in unexpected ways, so plan ahead for that.

4. Get Up and Pray
You are now in charge of your sleep schedule. Make time for Christ. Make time for church. Be the adult who can pull their sleepy self out of bed and go to Mass, because mom isn't going to be giving you the wake up calls anymore.

5. Ask For Help
You are going to need it. At some point. Whether you ask me, your older sister, your RA, or your boss, you aren't alone in this. Just because you are a legal adult does not mean you have to do this alone! Ask for help when you need it.

6. Say Thank You
Remember those thank you cards I mentioned? Send them. There is nothing more polite telling people thank you for what they've done for you. And not just your guests, your friends, your teachers, your parents and grandparents. They helped you take the baby steps that contributed to your last few steps to take your diploma and throw your cap. Thank 'em for it.

7.  New and Old
You are about to start something very new to you, meet new people, and begin a new life of sorts. You don't have to remain the same. This is an opportunity to change and grow. My brother, to our surprise, went Greek his freshman year. Several years later, he told it was because he wanted to be a different person than he was in high school. He wanted an environment that would help him to become more social, that would help stay accountable to his academics, and give him leadership opportunities. This summer is a good chance to ask what you like about yourself, what you are proud of, and what you wouldn't mind changing. Figure out who you want to be a year from now, four years from now, and be open to the new that will make that happen.

Proud of you, graduates. Make the best of the summer.

Tota tua.